b'dae matter..

it's been almost two weeks since i read manda's blog and then startes to wonder what the real mean of birthday. i mean, the whole concept of birthday, for me, has changed, quite in an oblivious manner, throughout my life.

for someone who has had her birthday for twenty times, i think it is quite justifiable for me to actually claim that birthday is just a day, with nothing special but a chance to put a markbench on our achievement in order to make sure that we have become someone better, at least for ourselves, in all our aspects of lives.

but ofcourse, who will deny the enjoyment of being showered with presents?

truth being told, as my age changes, the things that i look forward changes too. i used to wait and wait and wait for the two special days in my life, such as, chinese new year (and yes, it was very special because it was the only day when i felt rich!!), and my birthday. i even tried to calculate the amount of seconds that i had to wait before i could turn one year older!!

as i grew older, and forced to enter adulthood, i realised that my birthdays' memory were not as vivid as my childhood's birthday, whereby my age was so small that 1 candle was enough to be put on my birthday cake. i was soon in a sad relisation that what turned me to this cold person- the one that was not feeling something special even on her birthday, in fact, was nature.

and yes, it is hard to believe. why nature, you may ask. the answer lays on the same concept that people has been pondering and wondering to themselves about the war that has been going on for the past one decade. now, before you start to judge me by saying i have turned crazy, i want you to ask yourselves. as you grow up, do you feel more and more individualistic? do you care less and less towards the ones you love? well, i know i am. and as the technology improves in such a great speed and as each corporations try to be the one to please us, customers, do you realise that we are getting less and less thankful for what we already have?that we want more and more of everything?well, i realise i am.

as we turn to be individualistic and less appreciative fellows, we hurt others without caring about what we have done. we don't make any surprise party anymore. we don't give any more presents, or even a simple message saying 'happy birthday!'. we are thinking too much of ourselves that when what we do doesn't give us benefits, we simply put it on our 'not important list'. it is the same exact reason, i think, of why people start wars, of why there exists such thing called KKK, of why something meant to be good turns ugly(eg.terrorism).

birthdays don't feel wonderful anymore because we don't have so many people to celebrate it, or simply acknowledge it, anymore!!

on our part of the story, however, there is still something to blame on us. we simply need to try to be a little more content with whatever it is that we already have. anyway, by the end of the day, we'll be walking alone on our lives. people come and go, and still we have to make it by ourselves.

on my side of story, i am now trying to be a more non-individualistic kind of person. and for my part to make this world a better one, i have a new resolution : make at least one person happy for one day, especially on her/his birthday!!

i love you manda!!and it is just a part of growing up..no worries!!cheers, dear!!we can only hope that this world and the people in it will turn to be a better one one day..